Over the last few weeks I've seen a few different articles discussing the concept of self-care. It really made me think particularly what it means to me and how I utilize it in my own life. I'll be the first to admit that since having E I don't make self-care a priority. I'm usually focused on other things and believe me when I say it's not a bad thing but neglecting yourself isn't a good thing either. A quote I found defines self-care perfectly:
"Self care is about taking proper care of yourself and treating yourself as kindly as you treat others."
"Self care is about taking proper care of yourself and treating yourself as kindly as you treat others."
I believe that it's important to be the best version of yourself in order to take care of those around you. Too often people think that self-care involves money. That's just not true, it could be something as simple as lighting candles and taking a bubble bath. It could be putting on your favorite pair of cozy pajamas and reading a book. It could even be committing to getting more sleep or deciding to stop doing something you don't enjoy. There are a variety of ways to practice this concept.
One of the things for me is going for a run solo. I do enjoy running with E and I had to do that a lot in Louisiana because of Kyle's job but there were days when I just wanted it to be me. I'm not going to lie I was in a funk for a while. It's not that I wasn't happy with my life, I just wasn't happy with me. I was on edge, emotional, and just cranky. I finally realized that I needed that time to just recharge. Kyle's schedule will be drastically different here and I'm looking forward to the times where I can just zone out and clear my head alone. I want this to be a priority and I want to be the best version of myself that I can be so that I can be better especially for E. I want to show her that taking care of yourself is important. Just because I choose to focus on myself for 30 minutes a day doesn't mean that I am taking anything away from my daughter or my husband.
I've heard a lot of people call self-care a selfish act, it simply is
not. It is a way for a person to take care of themselves in order to
better care for others. Yes, when you have kids it becomes trickier but lean on your significant other, family, and friends if you can. Just as you make your significant
other and children a priority you need to make yourself one as well.
Do you practice self-care? If not, what are some ways you could start?
I totally agree with you that self care is important because if you don't take care of yourself, how are you supposed to care for everybody else? I love that you said that it doesn't have to be expensive, but that it can be as simple as taking a bubble bath by yourself!
ReplyDeleteAmen. It's sad that we're conditioned to feel guilty about it, but self-care is SO important and necessary. Sometimes all I want is an hour to myself. My hubs is always like "yes, go do it, whatever you need". And I so appreciate that because afterwards, I feel like a new person. :) Glad that you are prioritizing time for YOU, too. xo
ReplyDeleteI think the important thing in the long run is to make sure your daughter always feels like she's number one even above your own self.
ReplyDeleteMost parents will say this is true of what they do, but I don't think many of them really practice it.
My father died when I was young, so I can't really comment there
but my mother always put herself above me.
I remember having struggles getting my drivers tests done. I failed my first permit test and when I was ready for the 2nd one I was given "YOU BETTER BE READY IM NOT WASTING MY TIME (and two dollars) AGAIN" which set me back months out of de-motivation.
I remember going to countless country music concerts and race car events, but I never wanted to go to them. And yet we never went to anything like that I wanted to go to.
She also left me at a baseball game that was going to be rained out any minute to get a better pair of shoes, and got stuck in the hail storm but I luckily had managed to find a parent who left me sit in their car until my mother came back.
And the biggest thing that really woke my eyes up was when she made me sit in whole old Ford Taurus on the little space in the middle because the four door sedan sat only five and I was the sixth person. No seat belt or anything, but all her friend had to do was drive her car about 30 miles.
I wish it could of been something like a parent that makes the house really hot or really cold to save money on the power bill. Sure they didn't want to spend the money, but at least they were suffering along with us.
I'm sorry that you had to go through that. No one should have to feel like they aren't a priority. E is always my #1 priority but I have to be able to take care of myself as well. In order to be better for her I have to be better myself. If I am lacking in energy and my mood is down how can I be any good to her? In doing this one thing for me it makes me better for her.
DeleteSuch a great post! I think self-care is not selfish but sometimes people can make it that way (when they consistently use self-care as an excuse for neglecting their children, chores, etc)
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with this. Honestly its like in an aircraft .. you put on your oxygen first... only then can you be strong enough to help others with their oxygen. Its not selfish, sometimes taking care of You is taking care of others!
ReplyDeleteTotally agree!! Bring that baby to me and have all the self care you need Hahahaha!! Lol
ReplyDeleteHahahaha! Aww I wish I could! I know she would love you. :)
DeleteDefinitely! If I don't, I get quite cranky. But then again, I don't have the added responsibilities of a child, it's just me. ;) Definitely go and do some things for yourself girl!
ReplyDeleteSelf care is SO important! I love taking walks at night and just clearing my head! Also sitting out on the patio and reading a good book can do wonders!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that you wrote about this and that you are practicing self care! I only heard the term recently but I do think that it's really important to take time for yourself. I don't feel like I could be a good wife to Nick if I wasn't taking care of myself. One of my favorite things to do is take a bubble bath with a book. In Hawaii I love to go to the beach by myself and just walk or lay down and read a book. And blogging is something that I do for myself, too!
ReplyDeleteI think taking care of yourself no matter what stage of life you're in is SO important. I am currently feeling really "blah" about some stuff we have going on and it's beginning to take a toll. I'm trying really hard to focus on all the GOOD things and taking time for myself when I can. I needed this - thank you!! XO
ReplyDeleteSelf-care is SO important. Otherwise you can go nuts. I tend to read for my self-care. It helps calm me.
ReplyDeleteI agree!!! :) Focusing on yourself is never a bad thing.
DeleteAfter kids, you take a back seat on yourself without realizing it. It's one the reasons I started my blog. I also do yoga and have my own craft room. My family used to be upset when I took time for myself but after me losing it a couple of times they appreciate it as much as I do!
ReplyDeleteI am a total grouch if I don't make time for self care. Luckily I'm quite good at recognising my need, and so is my husband, but I can easily get sucked into feeling I'm being selfish. But I know I'm not, it's best for everyone if I'm not a grouch :)
ReplyDeleteI am so on the self care train. I cannot be a good mom if all I do is focus on them. I know a lot of people who called me selfish for putting my kids in hourly care but you what, I was recharged at pick up and it made everyone happier.
ReplyDeleteI feel like self care for moms must be so hard! I don't have kids but I always make time for exercise. That's my ME time, and when I don't get it I seem to be a wreck!
ReplyDeleteYes, definitely! In order to be the best mom, wife, sister, friend, daughter, etc. you HAVE to take care of yourself first! Hands down.
ReplyDelete