See this trail right here?! This is the trail I go to when I need to clear my head and knock out marathon training miles. It's so calming.
As I was running on Tuesday, I realized that I am only 5 1/2 weeks away from running my 2nd marathon (Rock n Roll New Orleans, woo!) and the panic/excitement began to set in. Then the doubt began to creep in as well. I have had several people tell me that I am crazy for attempting this with having had a baby only 5 months prior to the race. I have thought to myself, am I biting off more than I can chew? Am I not giving myself enough time to truly recover?
But then I realized that I don't NEED to run this race, I WANT to. I want to challenge myself, I want to know that I have trained enough to make it to the finish line. Of course anything can happen on race day and no matter what happens I will walk away with a sense of pride not only for that day but for the journey that has gotten me to that point.
Another thing that has been creeping into my mind is jealousy. Jealousy of those women who had babies around the same time that I did and who are already back in their pre-pregnancy clothes. I know that sounds petty but I've had moments where I think gosh what am I doing wrong. Then I realize that I'm not doing anything wrong, my body has changed. I also feel that society places unfair expectations on women to look a certain way and to bounce back from pregnancy the next day. I housed and grew a human for 9 months, my body will never be the same. I will carry weight differently and my hips are wider, but I have to remember that how I see myself is more important than how others see me. I have started focusing on being strong/fit versus being thin. I know this is all a mental thing for me and I am focusing on me rather than worrying about others, it's all a work in progress. :)
I am stronger than I give myself credit for and I'll keep pushing forward accomplishing things that others think I can't.
I am stronger than I give myself credit for and I'll keep pushing forward accomplishing things that others think I can't.
Have a great day!
Girl you are doing great! Don't stress about not being in your pre pregnancy clothes yet remember it took 9 months to put on it can take up to 9 months to take off. Good luck on your race!
ReplyDeleteYOU GO GIRL!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you!!!
DeleteWhile it may sound annoying coming from me because I was back to prepregnacy weight only a few weeks after having Anna, everyone is different! I was thinking about this yesterday actually- SO many people said my body would never look/be the same and I listened and got rid of shorts and pants I thought I'd never got into again...but I should've waited to see what would happen as we all carry and lose weight differently. I've gotten crap for "bouncing back" and many snide remarks.l that hurt my feelings "did you even have a baby or are you sure she's yours"...like come on, people. I know these stem from their own insecurities and struggles, but don't rain on my parade, lol. I gained 21 pounds and am long...and genetics has some to do with it, too- my mom was the same way with all three pregnancies and she was already on baby #2 when she was my age. And breastfeeding burns SO many calories so that may have had something to do with it. I sometimes compare myself to others about different aspects of my life and get really down, but it does absolutely no good. I'm actually reading a book/doing a work book now about self confidence- I'll message you about it since I know you're doing psychology! Keep your chin up, mama- you're beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThat does look like a beautiful trail! For what it's worth I think your achievements are amazing, and to me running a marathon is WAY more impressive than looking 'skinny'. Appearances can be deceptive - being strong/fit is definitely more of an achievement!
ReplyDeleteYou are doing great! Seriously, you are such a champ for running a marathon 5 months after giving birth!!
ReplyDeleteYou're doing great!!
ReplyDeleteThank you!!!
DeleteI think people who say you're crazy are only saying so because THEY couldn't do it ;) I think you're awesome! And, to echo everyone else...first of all, you look great, seriously. Second of all, you're about to run a MARATHON. Think of all the stick-thin people (with or without kids) who can't even run a mile without wanting to die. You're a beast and you've got this!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you that society really does put too much pressure on women to all of a sudden look like they didn't have a baby like a month after giving birth. It's completely unrealistic for most women! Just know that you are awesome! I can't imagine running more than 6 miles, and you're going to run 26.2 miles! And you had a baby 5 months ago! You're going to do great!
ReplyDeleteYou've got this. I trained for mine with a friend who had a baby just 6 months before the marathon and she rocked it. Granted she had run 16 before but you have run for years as well and it's all about muscle memory. You're going to kill it!! :)
ReplyDeleteOur bodies are amazing and you my friend, are running a marathon just a few months post-E! That's AMAZING too!
ReplyDeleteYes they are! :) Thank you sweet friend! <3
DeleteTrying is certainly key
ReplyDeleteI agree!
DeleteYou running this marathon no matter how long it takes you is amazing. It is so hard to not compare ourselves to others, but always remember comparison is the thief of joy. You have and amazing little girl! Have a happy Holiday!
ReplyDeleteYou're truly amazing for being so determined to get to that finish line! And you're in school on top of that... And you just had the most beautiful baby girl ever! Your weight will come off and even if it doesn't, you still look gorgeous!! xx
ReplyDeleteI think unfair expectations are place on ourselves by ourselves because of what we see others doing. I often see people running (ahem, you :) and think "I should be doing that" but I really don't like to run, so it's taken a very long time for me to push away that mindset.
ReplyDeleteI think you're doing just fine! (on your OWN timeline :)
I was just thinking the other day that you look great!! I know it's hard but try not to be so hard on yourself. I remember when Riley turned 6 months I finally really started to feel like I had my "groove" back ;)
ReplyDeleteObviously you know I'm going to say screw what everyone else say if it's encouraging and uplifting. After baby it is hard to come to terms with your new body. Even at the same size things just don't fit the same and they likely never will. Just keep doing what you are doing and you will be just fine. As far as running, you will do amazing! I love your attitude towards it. It is something I have always admired about you.
ReplyDeleteI think you're doing great! It is so hard not to compare myself to other moms too but you just gotta do you. And real talk, even if you get back to pre-pregnancy weight, you may never fit into your old clothes again. I know I didn't, some of my pants just didn't fit quite right. You continue to inspire me with all your races and running!
ReplyDelete