Wednesday, December 5, 2018

One is Enough

Since posting that Kyle had a vasectomy, I had a few people message me and ask how we came to the conclusion that E was going to be our only child. To be honest, it was not a decision that we made lightly. We know how it feels to grow up with siblings and we often wondered if E would be missing out on that. I wanted to share how we came to this decision. I'm in no way justifying our decision to anyone because at the end of the day it's our choice. I just wanted to shed some light on our thoughts. 

If you have been following my blog for any length of time you know that we experienced recurrent pregnancy losses, 7 years of fertility problems, and multiple treatments. It was absolutely heartbreaking to go through. It was emotionally and physically draining on both of us. One of my biggest fears of attempting to get pregnant again is going through this all over again. I'm 33 years old right now and the thought of having more problems is just not something we are willing to risk. The heartbreak of a lengthy infertility journey is not something we want to experience again. I never want to have to write a post like this again.
Now my next reason might seem odd as we did struggle for so long to have E and having a successful pregnancy was so important. I DID NOT enjoy being pregnant. While I am so grateful to have experienced it, it was just not something that was enjoyable for me. It wasn't even weight gain or anything like that. I just never felt the overwhelming love of being pregnant. 
With Kyle being active duty military, it's hard! The reason I say this because of the constantly in and out of the service member. It's SO hard on kids when one parent is gone so frequently. We see E struggle a bit when Kyle is gone and how clingy she is when he returns. I can't even imagine having to manage the emotions of more than one kiddo. Shout out to all the parents out there that manage more than one kiddo within the military. Y'all are rockstars! 
Most of all we are a happy little family of 3. We have a good rhythm and routine. While I am sure that E would do well with a sibling, we don't want to rock to boat. We are SO blessed to have her and we just want to enjoy her. While we know that it's possible to spread love between all children, we don't want to have to do that. 
All of these reasons really fueled our decision to remain a family of 3. 

We are SO beyond thankful for E! As soon as she entered this world we knew that our family was complete. 

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