Thursday, June 9, 2016

The Journey To A Better Me

Earlier this week I decided to sign Kyle and I up for another 5k this weekend, he is a gem and just nods and smiles when I make suggestions like this. Not only does it greatly benefit him but it also helps keep me active through this pregnancy. I have done my best to walk/jog several times a week because I know that is only going to benefit me in the long run. 

As I was signing us up for the race I realized that this is race #60 for us, 60!! That is an insane number considering we only started participating in them 3 years ago. I can honestly say that it has been one of the most fulfilling journeys I have been on. 

When I started running I was 40 pounds overweight and dealing with a stressful fertility journey that included rounds and round of fertility medication that wreaked havoc on my body. I wasn't happy and I knew that something had to change. I started out slow, only running maybe a mile at a time and realized that it was far more than exercise, it had become a therapy. I could run out all of my anger, sadness, and frustration in a healthy way. It helped me cope with some of the most devastating experiences in my life. I became the person that I knew I was supposed to be.

As my journey progressed I found myself getting stronger both physically and emotionally. When Kyle and I started doing races together it was not about being fast it was about experiencing something new and being proud of our accomplishments. It was about pushing ourselves to do something we never thought we could do, and being each others biggest cheerleaders. Crossing that finish line and realizing that you just did something that not many people want to do is pretty amazing.
First Race: April 2013

Most Recent Race: May 2016

I had a few people try to bring me down on my journey, some told me that my excessive running was to blame for my fertility problems, and some that tried to make running competitive. I hold no ill will towards the people who said these things, it is all part of my journey. Both of these situations fueled me to continue to do things how I wanted and to not listen to those negative people around me. 

I am beyond grateful for all this journey has taught me and I look forward to all that it will teach me in the future. For me running is not about a number on the scale it is about how you feel mentally and physically, feeling strong and capable to take on anything is the message that Kyle and I want to pass on to our daughter.