Before I get into the reason behind this post I want to give our reasons for announcing our pregnancy so early. We have been through several miscarriages throughout our 5 years of marriage. We didn't announce all of the pregnancies and when they ended we felt so incredibly alone. We had no one to talk to and no support system. It was the most lonely and awful feeling. We knew that when we announced that there was always a possibility that something could go wrong but we took our chances.
Fast forward to now...well the worst has happened. I had a few issues that had me in the OB clinic, although not alarming still cause for concern. Let me just say that dealing with all of this while Kyle was gone is incredibly difficult but he has been amazing from far away. We got the results yesterday and they were not good. I was diagnosed with an ectopic pregnancy (for those that don't know it's a pregnancy that develops outside of the uterus in the fallopian tube). I was crushed, defeated and lost. They administered a shot that would help me pass everything and get my HCG levels back down to 0. If we opted against this shot it could be very dangerous for me. It will take a few days, maybe even a week or so to happen.
To not have my husband here has been the worst part of it all. He is struggling right now to stay focused on work but I know he is hurting. I can hear the pain in his voice, he finally comes home tonight and I can't wait.
To have the love and support of family and friends has been so comforting. After I left the hospital I met up with Britt and we had lunch. It was so nice to be with a friend and have time to talk about anything and everything.
Through all of this we haven't lost hope, we know that our time will come and that we will be blessed with the most perfect child. We don't know how it will happen whether it be naturally, adoption or surrogacy we WILL be parents. I don't doubt that at all.
I promise I will get back to reading blogs sometime this week, just taking time to process all of this. Hugs everyone!
I promise I will get back to reading blogs sometime this week, just taking time to process all of this. Hugs everyone!
