Being a military spouse is something that I never thought I would be. Of course all of that changed when Kyle and I got married in 2008. (If you are a new reader and don't know our story check it out here)
Kyle was already in the military, having commissioned the year before, and was living in NC at Fort Bragg. I was thrown into this whirlwind and I was terrified. Quite a few of my family members were in the military but I did not have direct experience with it. You are thrown into this dynamic of soldiers, spouses, and protocol. I was living in a new place, with a husband who was gone all the time, and I had to find where I fit.
I was lucky enough to find a group of friends outside of Kyle's unit and some within. A senior spouse took me under her wing and really guided me in those early years, helping me figure out where I belonged. She is still one of my dearest friends (well family) and her husband has been an amazing mentor to Kyle.
2009- I didn't know a lot of people but I attended any event I could.
Once I was able to figure out who I was, I was able to really take hold of what I wanted to do and what impact I wanted to have. I became really involved in the FRG (family readiness group) and thrived on planning events, running fundraisers, and providing help/resources to those who needed it. I learned a lot from my leaders at the time and it served me well later when I became an FRG leader and a Battalion Senior Advisor.
Being able to volunteer and be a part of the units that Kyle was in made me feel connected. Kyle was never the type to tell me that he didn't want me a part of his work life, too often I have seen soldiers who do not want their spouses to be a part of groups such as the FRG. That makes me sad because even in the not so great ones you might just make one friend that will last a lifetime. I have so many amazing friends that I have met over the years and they are a huge part of our lives. Even as a spouse if you don't want to volunteer, attend the ceremonies (changes of command, promotions, changes of responsbility, etc) they are full of so much history and you will still meet some awesome people.
When Kyle took company command in 2013, I was able to take all I had learned and put it to good use. I knew the type of leader I wanted to be and the type I didn't want to be. I wanted every single spouse to feel as though they belonged, that no matter who they were or where they came from that they had something to offer and that they were wanted. I also wanted the soldiers to know that I cared. I was at the company at least 3 times a week, I wanted them to see me and know who I was and I wanted to know them. It was probably one of the most rewarding experiences of my life, being able to give back to those who give so much was an honor. I can't wait for E to be old enough to volunteer with me.
I have always been the type of have a glass half full type of attitude, is life perfect, no way. However, when you make the most of it it can be really amazing. I also know that there are those who don't want to be involved and that's okay, I commend them for knowing that about themselves. Even as a spouse if you don't want to be involved with the military side find ways to volunteer in the local community,
I've been able to experience a lot of cool things because I chose to be involved. Watching 20,000 soldiers run in formation during All American Week, dressing up as Blind Mice for a unit Trunk or Treat, volunteering to serve food at the largest pancake breakfast awarded to a military installation, walk with some amazing ladies to support our deployed soldiers on Veterans Day, and honor amazing volunteers who give their time to others. All of these experiences were made better by the people involved.
I've been able to experience a lot of cool things because I chose to be involved. Watching 20,000 soldiers run in formation during All American Week, dressing up as Blind Mice for a unit Trunk or Treat, volunteering to serve food at the largest pancake breakfast awarded to a military installation, walk with some amazing ladies to support our deployed soldiers on Veterans Day, and honor amazing volunteers who give their time to others. All of these experiences were made better by the people involved.
Honestly, this doesn't even have to directly apply to military life, it applies to life in general. Get out there, get involved in your communities, and get connected to the places and people you are co-existing with. Find and do something that you are passionate about, it can make all the difference.
