Friday, October 23, 2015

My Thoughts On Weddings

I saw a commercial today for Kay Jewelers and according to them we are officially in engagement season, I guess I didn't realize that there was such a thing lol. Of course with an engagement comes the task of planning a wedding. 

I have friends and family that have had everything from a courthouse wedding to an extremely lavish and expensive wedding. Now I am not saying there is a right or wrong way to do but I thought it would be fun to share my thoughts.

I have actually been on both sides of the spectrum. My first wedding (yes I have been married before and got divorced after a year) was a big one, every little detail was planned to a T, the dress, the venue, the food, etc. The one thing I remember the most was how MISERABLE I was. 

I was stressed to the max and instantly regretted going to all the trouble to plan something that would only last a few hours. The only good part was my dress lol:


Now when Kyle and I got married we both knew exactly what we wanted. A low key wedding with no fanfare because at that point in our lives we didn't want a big production. We paid $286 to get married at The Viva Las Vegas Wedding Chapel, it was absolutely perfect for us! We had 13 people there and it was broadcasted on the internet so others could watch. 

My family didn't mind however Kyle's parents were less than thrilled but they respected that it was what we wanted. I look back on our pictures and am reminded that it didn't matter what dress I wore or how many people were there, it was a stress free day, just how we wanted.

At the end of the day it's all about what makes the bride and groom happy. :) 





Are you a big wedding or smaller wedding type of person? Was your wedding exactly what you wanted or did you feel pressure from others?

Have a great weekend!!



41 comments:

  1. I've yet to get married, but my idea of a wedding has definitely evolved over the years... From wanting a big, lavish one to now just wanting a small, simple one. Love both dresses!!

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  2. I love these pictures! Thanks for sharing! I always wanted a big country club wedding, but when we decided to push it up and plan it in seven weeks, going with something smaller-ish was our only choice. We were married on the beach with around 100 people in attendance (which was small compared to what I had wanted in my hometown!), and it was the most perfect wedding day. I always joke that the wedding I dreamed about my whole life ended up not being my dream wedding at all. I thought it was so cool that I did not have to introduce myself to one person at our wedding. Everyone was either family, a very close friend, or a close friend's significant other, and I knew every single one of them! It was incredible. I'm all for big or small weddings, as long as it's what you truly want!

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    1. To me that is how a wedding should be! I didn't want strangers at our wedding.

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  3. I had both...Ryan and I got married at the court house and then 8 months later we had a big wedding. If I could have a redo I would do a destination and keep it low key and simple. I'm not sure destination is low key or simple, but traveling with my closest family and friends and celebrating for longer than just 1 day/night seems like SO much fun.

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  4. I am not a big wedding person. My husband and I had a smallish wedding (around 75 people) - just s simple evening ceremony in a church and then a dinner/dancing reception at a historic mansion outside of Philadelphia. It was almost 11 years ago...I probably wouldn't change much other than having even less people there! :) I've always liked the idea of a brunch ceremony too....there is something so special about the start of the day.

    I wasn't stressed about my wedding - it wasn't ornate or planned down to the last detail. To be honest, I just didn't care. The only thing that mattered was getting married to my Clay. When I look at our wedding photos, I don't see a super fancy setting. I see a simple and joyous day filled with an unmeasurable amount of love. :)

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    1. Yes! I didn't care either, I just wanted to get married and move to NC!

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  5. Cheers to the wedding that is YOU!!!!! <3

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  6. We didn't have a wedding- we got married at the El Paso courthouse a few days after we got here, haha. We had been together for two and s half years at that point and engaged for 3 months, but when it came down to the logistics of it because of the army, this was the best way to go (health insurance, I had a few semesters of school left & would be paying out of state tuition if we weren't married). We contemplated not telling anyone and having a wedding back home, but I wasn't on board with keeping it a secret. Plus, we would be paying for the entire thing and planning it from across the country sounded like a nightmare and just the thought made my anxiety sky rocket! I hope that doesn't sound crappy, but most bride's family pay for all or most of the expenses and it didn't seem fair or logical for us to start off our marriage possibly going into debt (I knew having a small wedding under a few thousand would be impossible as we both have huge families & very vocal and opinionated family members). To be honest, I do feel sad sometimes for not experiencing walking down the aisle with my dad, wearing a wedding dress & feeling beautiful for one day, having a first dance with Tyler, etc. He was married before too and they had a huge wedding- 350 people- and went on a honeymoon and they were 19...so sometimes I felt like maybe i wasn't deserving of something so special and memorable. But then I put my big girl panties on and know that that stuff doesn't define love and commitmen

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    1. I thought Kyle was going to feel the same way (cheated about not having a bigger wedding), I know that sounds silly for a guy but thankfully he wanted a small wedding too. I love your last sentence, I had to get over the idea that all weddings had to be a big to do.

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  7. I think both ways are lovely! We had a small family affair, at my Aunt's house... It happened to be a huge old Victorian and he wore his Dress Greens and I wore a matching green dress... The pictures look like we had a themed 1940's wedding... In reality it was thrown together 3 days before, haha. I do look back though and wish I had a lavish WHITE wedding dress and more of a formal affair, but really, We were blessed with family and had all we could have wanted, who could ask for more.

    Also, both your dresses were stunning!

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    1. Haha our wedding was thrown together too! We got engaged on a Wednesday and married on a Saturday lol. :) Thanks sweet friend!

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  8. Oh my gosh, I love how your wedding was broadcast on the internet so people who couldn't make it could watch!! I loooove going to weddings (regardless of the size or fanfare) and watching two people in love!

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  9. We did a medium type wedding if there is such a thing!?!?! I wanted the dress and the beautiful venue but I wanted it different. We spent under $15,000 and it was just what we wanted and what we could afford. There was a lot of stress but the day of it was nothing but joy. Since getting married I am a lot more open minded to weddings and realizing it is all about what the bride and groom want because it is there day to profess their love for one another. I think all ways are beautiful. I think the different the better sometimes!!!

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    1. I do love the more unique weddings, there is something special about that to me.

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  10. We had a fairly small wedding (less than 80 people total) which was great because it allowed us to have everything we wanted. And our day was perfect. Cold, but perfect. I love that people got to watch your wedding live! That would be such a good idea even if you had a larger wedding, but had family or friends who couldn't make it.

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    1. Yes! It was so nice to have that option for our wedding. I still have no idea who even watched haha.

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  11. We got married in the courthouse with just close friends and then almost 2 years later we had a marriage blessing/huge wedding. I was so low stressed with the wedding planning, and actually tomorrow is our marriage blessing-anniversary but we don't celebrate it. My bff is getting married and driving me absolutely crazy (so bad to say) but for a lot of reasons I just think she's more into the wedding than actually getting married.

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  12. I never wanted a big wedding. Our wedding was exactly what I wanted. Small and in my family's home. It was a little stressful because we had to get the house ready for guests, but overall it was easy.
    I know so many people who spend above their family's budget for weddings and the marriage doesn't last. It's sad. But some people care more about the wedding than marrying the person they love.

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    1. Your last sentence is so true for many!

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  13. Our wedding was small. We got married at a chapel on base, but it was just our parents, my sister, and the friends who lived there. Maybe 20 people in all. The guys wore their dress blues and the did the whole sword thing, but it was small. We got our daughter baptized at the same time. Later we all went back to the house and BBQ'ed. It was perfect for me! I think we spent more on food for the day than anything else.

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    1. That's how it was for us! We had 13 people but only family members went to lunch and back to my inlaws to swim.

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  14. Haha I am still undecided on the wedding thing. I think I want a big church wedding, but if I HAD to, I could do a small courthouse ceremony (with the hopes that we'd do a vow renewal later on.) That's so cool that your wedding was broadcasted on the Internet!

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  15. I'm an in betweener! I'm not a fan of spending a ton of money on a wedding, but I definitely wanted something that all of our friends and family could come to... so getting married in a national forest (FREE!!!) and serving BBQ (from a restaurant but NOT wedding catering... so much less expensive) worked out perfectly for us! :)

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  16. I'm definitely more of a small wedding kind of person - I think people get too caught up on the wedding and not the marriage. The best advice I got was right after I got engaged was "if at the end of that you're married, it was a good wedding"

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  17. I definitely like the small wedding idea. I went small all the way!

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  18. We got married at the jail... Sadly, we didn't take a picture of us in front of the jail.

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  19. We were married in the base chapel where we were stationed in England. I bought the first wedding dress I tried on...since I searched the racks til one met my criteria. I paid $200 for my dress 38 years ago. A lady from the chapel made our wedding cake, picked from a Wilton book of cakes so it was free to us..their wedding gift. There was a bit of stress since we were getting married overseas and my mom wanted me to come home to Oregon and get married. Phil and I discussed it but it was not going to happen, to make a long story short. It all worked out fine with help of friends and we happy with the end results, except someone flattening my husband's car tire! Sigh! I've not parted with my dress yet!

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  20. We got married in my parents' back yard, and even that was too much planning for me. I couldn't imagine having to do something bigger.

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  21. First marriage I had about 30 guests. Second marriage I wanted small but my husband's parents wanted large.

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  22. We had a big wedding because that is what my parents wanted and they were paying :/ A big wedding after we got married by the justice of the peace a couple months prior is probably worth mentioning. Looking back I wish we would have done a small wedding once. Simple and just focused on the act of getting married.

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  23. You looked so beautiful on both of your big days! A little more happy on the second one though :)

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  24. We eloped so there was zero pressure from family and friends because no one knew! haha it was absolutely perfect. I grew up wanting a huge wedding though so I'm not sure how I ended up with an elopement. But I don't regret it one bit and wouldn't change it for the world.

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  25. Our wedding was somewhere in between a lavish affair and the low key wedding. For the area, middle of nowhere Alabama, it was considered a big wedding as we used the only catholic church and booked the nicest location that let us have alcohol at the reception. For NY standards, it was a small wedding but nicely done. Since it was out of town we had about 50 people there total, mainly family. I think because there weren't many options to choose from it wasn't terribly stressful to me. For me it was just the right size. Not too many people or too big of a venue. However I could have eloped and been perfectly content.

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  26. I feel like as far as weddings go today, ours was pretty traditional. Church marriage and a formal dinner/dancing reception after, but we just had family and about ten friends, and I didn't look at Pinterest at ALL! :) It is possible to do that in 2015! I didn't stress over decisions and just enjoyed it, and I think it turned out to be a wonderful day. I love that you guys got married in Vegas. That is awesome!

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  27. We had a small wedding. I don't like big weddings. All the stress some ladies put on themselves for one perfect day. My mom always says "you don't need a perfect day, just a perfect marriage." I think more people should remember that a wedding is just one day but a marriage is forever.

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  28. I wish we could have had a bigger wedding. I loved what we did, but I wish the rest of my family and my best friends could have been there. Oh well, we'll throw a kickass anniversary party one of these years.

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  29. I am Team Small Wedding all the way!

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  30. We got married at the courthouse with no one. I didn't mind the small wedding part but I'd have family and a photographer there if we were to do it again.

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  31. Matt and I actually got married twice. We had a court house wedding right after Lucas was born. It was supposed to be before hand, but Lucas decided he wanted to be a part of the day. :) Then a little over a year later we had our big wedding for family and friends. It was fun, but was way too stressful and I almost cancelled it. In some respects I wish I had, but I enjoyed aspects of both ceremonies.

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  32. I'm more of a low-key wedding type as well. When Richard and I got married, he was in a country where he didn't speak the language, so him organizing things were slightly difficult. I was in the middle of my college finals plus doing a 10-hour per week internship that actually needed a lot of prep-time that was outside the 10 hours I spent in school teaching. So I outsourced whatever I could, we printed the invites ourselves once the date was finally set (like three weeks before the actual event, because of paperwork issues), I had my dress made by a friend (yes, I totally splurged on that), we only invited the people we absolutely wanted to have there (about 20), had a nice little reception in a country-side restaurant and the ceremony at the library because luckily for us, the courthouse was being renovated at the moment :-) I was stressed beforehand due to school and the internship, but I absolutely enjoyed the day itself. Generally speaking, in my eyes, a successful wedding is when the couple is married at the end :-)

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  33. I had a destination wedding with 45 people, which was perfect for me because we all had a little vacation together. I totally get the super small wedding mentality though. I love your second dress- sooo fun and pretty! <3

    <3 Have Ashley

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Love hearing from you!! :)